Yeah. It's fucking November.
Not only was I promoted to Manager at work, flown away to St. Louis MO for training for two and half weeks, dealt with all the insane crazy stress that came with the job, but it is now a time in place and matter that I am no longer manager.
I had an affair with a married man. Nothing penetrating mostly slurping. But still. The chaotic-ness of the situation is still something I'm trying to comprehend. Just the whole story and the whole situation is so fucked-up, it would have happened to me- and boy golly it happened hard.
The toxicicity of this town is so infectious. I am literally weeping away from the inside out- all my decisions being a malfeasance from greed and egotistical outsources. I just don't know these days.
I work and work and work and work and work and work. And I get paid once a month. I try and try to be a succesful adult. I got a car- but now it doesn't work. It's like no matter how much money I invest into becoming what is considered a "normal" adult, isn't working. I'm destined to rot in this town. I'm destined to be used by people. I just don't know these days.
Whatever. I don't wanna get sad. I just wanted to post something, since my last was in fucking JULY!!! jeez.
I literally don't know what to say to my friends anymore- I just feel like I'm not good enough to make any of them happy. I just want to be content with my life. Is that too hard to ask??
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